In a stunning bit of oxymoronic logic inversion — worthy of Dubbya himself — Pakistani Foreign Ministry Spokeswoman Tasnim Aslam restated the premise for Pakistan’s National Assembly unanimously demanding a papal retraction.
When Grumpy News asked the boggle-eyed henna junkie for further clarification Ms. Aslam commented, “I said — Yo Pope — Call me violent … Im gonna kick your ass!”
The Pope’s citation from a late 14th-century dialogue on Christianity and Islam has beeen widely quoted in the press with emphasis on Islam’s bringing “only evil and inhuman” things to the world theological table.
The Vatican Office on Outreach to the Muslim World has issued a statement saying ” Obviously we are sorry for any offence given. Everyone knows 14th century religion was all good. Like a Tupperware Party in a Unitarian basement full of Quakers. What’s wrong with a Little Peace, Love and Understanding, y’all.”
Amidst calls from Muslim Scholars for the Pope’s removal Benedict himself has called for a meeting.
“I hope Tasnim comes to the meeting … ’cause I need to know how she gets that brassy post Haj shine on her ‘do. I really dont think this white is working for me anymore — you know just ’cause there’s snow on the roof don’t mean Dante’s Inferno isn’t burning downstairs. I think its time to change it up.”