Things got a little sticky for brides Marcia Cross and Niclole Kidman wearing this seasons hottest bridal must have — foreheads stretched so tight you could bounce a nickel off ‘em (for full technicolor glory click here )
Summer Wedding Accessories for Glacial Beauties
When accessorizing your Summer wedding Nicole and Marcia know its all about creating the right (fore)headspace
Whether it’s a barefoot beach wedding amidst Sydney’s soft sand and swelling waves or a traditional and elegant affair in a garden just off Wisteria Lane — summer weddings carry all of the toxic intrigue of the season: the long, balmy days, the crisp chill of air conditioning, the icy clink of cubes in Campari as you press the cool glass to your impeccably smooth freshly ‘toxed brow.
Weddding Bouquet: Summer blooms make marvelous accessories and can be selected specifically to blend (or contrast) with your existing color scheme. Consider some of the following for inclusion as summer wedding accessories:
Baby’s breath, the traditional bouquet enhancer, is in full bloom from May through August and is lovely both on its own or interspersed with other blooms. And remember Adopted baby’s breath from a former bouquet count’s just as much — if not more.
The daisy, a classic wedding flower, flourishes from May through December. As your own May-December romance fuses your youthful exterior with your worldly-wise pre-nup let this beautiful bloom symbolizes purity of motive, optimism about the future and good legal advice.
Chrysanthemums – and the ‘mums the word’ approach is a long long time favorite for bridal bouquets and centerpieces. Their beauty is dramatic reminder that any little touch up work you’ve had done before the big day is not appropriate to share with friends, family or press.
Since summer weddings are full of brightness and energy, be sure to powder down your large shiny forehead lest the reflection blind guests or clergy. Hand held fans carry the dual purpose of beautifying your headspace and keeping your guests eyeline distracted form anything odd in your youthful visage.
Decorative pails can be filled with sand, shells, or even suntan lotion, sunglasses and visors are all summer accessories that can be distributed as wedding favors – particularly to family members who may be as melanin challenged as your ice goddess self.
Finally place bowls of exotic summer fruit on each table, or simply place one large and decorative fruit bowl on a buffet table. Summer fruits are delectable and colorful and will provide a most appreciated treat for guests! Because you may have been married to a famous ’small and decorative fruit’ or even momentarily suspected of being a bit of “a fruit cocktail’ yourself — serving tropical drinks or smoothies is a wonderfully ironic touch.
And marriage at our age … the foreheads my be ironed wonderfully flat … but the irony is flat out wonderful!
17 Comments
June 30, 2006 at 1:48 pm
Oh, goodness, this is too funny! You chose two perfect examples of Botox Gone Awry. No wonder they seem like Ice Queens….they can’t express any emotion ~ literally! Great text to go with it. Brilliant stuff!
June 30, 2006 at 2:13 pm
Ha! Funny!
I’ve often dreamt about bouncing a knicle off of their heads or maybe a small brick.
Great illo.
love
June 30, 2006 at 3:23 pm
Laughing hard here! Thank you for brightening my morning!
June 30, 2006 at 4:05 pm
Too funny!! Egads, you just saved my day!
July 1, 2006 at 2:08 pm
Very inspired writing with that lovely cartoon. I especially liked the strange little fruit.
July 2, 2006 at 6:58 am
July 2, 2006 at 5:11 pm
This is hilarious, almost dropped off my chair laughing. That’s one sticky wedding illustration. Great work with drawing.
July 4, 2006 at 1:49 am
True true true! And to be honest if I need some in the future I would definately get it because all girls are vain no matter what their age.
Very nice illustration of one of the seven deadly sins!
July 4, 2006 at 5:16 am
Very accurate and elegantly drawn caricatures. You have unusual talent.
July 5, 2006 at 2:17 pm
too true. this is an excellent illo and a very unique perspective on the topic. socially conscious too – what more could i want…
December 1, 2006 at 4:59 pm
[...] I don’t know what the hell Raekwon is talking about, why the hell would someone want to make a record for the hood. All the “hood” gives you is bullets in the back and herpes in the front. Trust me I know from many years in the Celebrity Gossip Hollyhood ghetto, where the prices of respectful journalism results gory pictures of shots in the face, and scars across the belly. [...]
April 9, 2007 at 12:43 pm
Good site!!!
December 18, 2007 at 1:43 am
Loved it. You couldn’t have picked two more perfect examples of hideous looking women… just so fake and unnatural. And Kidman tells us she has had nothing done. Please don’t treat us like idiots. Thank God for my wrinkles.. I’ve earned them.
December 30, 2007 at 9:42 pm
[...] the ensuingmadness. The Desperate Housewife has been featured here before during her days as a Botox Bride. Having made an ill-advised decision to bin some nudie photos her husband took, she soon found [...]
September 10, 2008 at 1:36 am
[...] getting botox isn’t really a new thing, as the Grumpy old indian Man wrote about Marcia Cross and Nicole Kidman in 2006. But it seems the idea of [...]
July 25, 2009 at 3:03 pm
both of them are beautiful
September 27, 2009 at 7:36 pm
nicole kidman uses botox?